What’s up with Barbie?

Well, her chest size for one! Man, I just went shopping for a birthday present for one of Maddie’s classmates. I know she’d really like a Barbie doll. I could not find one Barbie fully clothed. They’ve got Summer Beach glam Barbie in which our 42DD Barbie is wearing a sort of bikini that doesn’t even cover her boobs. Or Top Model Barbie, baywatch Barbie, trampy Barbie, come get ya’ some Barbie. OK not the last three but close. Can we bring Barbie out of the dark ages?

Give her a breast reduction and clothes that fit and cover her pieces and parts. I realize there are some career type Barbies out there but to me they still scream “you can be a veterinarian sure but you gotta be THIS hot to do it!” How about “Nursed All My Kids” Barbie where the boobs hang just a little lower, or “Eat Too Much After The Kids Go To Bed” Barbie with bigger hips? I know. They totally would not sell. It just irks me that the dolls currently on the market portray nasty, self-absorbed, greedy girls with minimal and/or suggestive clothes. Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to suck it up and visit several stores until I find a good one.

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9 responses to this post.

  1. I’m married to you, and this made me laugh out loud still.

    New material from you rocks!!!!

    Reply

  2. Posted by Beth on March 24, 2008 at 8:15 am

    I wrote this last semester for a Poetry class. I look at Barbie today and think about the pain and agony of having huge breasts. I looked up what Barbie’s measurements would be if she were life-sized and figured her bra size. I recently had a breast reduction surgery and it was the best thing I’ve done for my body and myself. After 2 back surgeries (and potentially one more) from ruptured discs, frequent migraines, inability to do physical activities and low self-esteem, I finally took the doctors’ advise and got the surgery. People often feel comfortable talking about many plastic surgery procedures like tummy tucks, facelifts, nose jobs, and breast implants…but there is not a lot of discussion for breast reductions. Some people don’t understand the physical and mental anguish overly large breasted women suffer

    Barbie, about your breasts…
    By Beth Kalnins, an ex-G cup girl

    Oh, Barbie, I know why you don’t wear bras.
    Where in the world do you even find a 32J? Do they even make a 32J?

    Do you suffer from back pains? How have you evaded the back surgeries most of us big breasted women have had?

    How about arm numbness? Do you have migraines from the weight of those breasts pulling down on you?

    How can you possibly have J cups and not have any sagging? Only you can be so breasty and still pass the pencil test.

    How do you do all those jobs like flight attendant or business woman? Don’t you hit people in the head with those things? Don’t business associates assume you are stupid? Do you use that to your advantage in the corporate world…and outside?

    How do you get your clothes to fit? Aren’t you tired of buying shirts three sizes too big just so they will button up? I’m sure you understand what “gaposis” is. No wonder you wear two piece swimsuits – a one piece will never work.

    A couple of years ago you got plastic surgery to get a belly button. Why? Can you even see the work that was done?

    Do yourself a favor, girl…get the breast reduction and be the 32C we know you can be. You will be free of the pain, the leers, and the assumptions of your easiness and stupidity.

    .

    Reply

  3. Posted by Joni on March 24, 2008 at 8:34 am

    Well said.

    Reply

  4. This is why my little girl never had a barbie.

    But I would LOVE to see a “Nursed All My Kids” Barbie”. THAT I would buy!!!

    Reply

  5. LOL!!!!

    You need to send this post to Mattel! Maybe they’ll hire you for their creative team?!

    Reply

  6. I just came across your blog. This post is great. I got a laugh out of it and it is very true. Sadly we are sending all the wrong messages to young ladies today.
    Keep preaching

    Reply

  7. Your post inspired me!

    Reply

  8. love it – so true. You made me laugh!!

    I’ve never bought a Barbie for my little girl who is now 6. She’s never asked for one, thank goodness!

    Reply

  9. Posted by Karen on December 6, 2009 at 7:25 pm

    Barbie had a make over in 2000 she got a wide wait a breast reduction, and it is not impossible to have the barbie look 1 in every 100,000 women have it!

    Reply

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